high standards are the beginning of a life upgrade

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Let’s talk about standards—high standards. You know, that thing people accuse you of having “too much” of? Well, newsflash: high standards are not the problem; they’re the solution. Whether it’s about relationships, friendships, career goals, or just how you treat yourself, high standards are the ultimate cheat code to leveling up your life.

Part 1: The Truth About Standards

Let’s start here: What are standards, anyway? Standards are basically your rules for how you allow people—and even yourself—to show up in your life. They’re your non-negotiables, your “yes, absolutelys” and “hell no, nevers.”

Now, the thing about standards is that they dictate everything: how you’re treated, what you tolerate, and even what you accomplish. And here’s the kicker—having low standards is just as much a choice as having high ones.

Here’s an analogy: Imagine you’re a gatekeeper for a private club. The people, opportunities, and habits you let in shape your experience inside. If you let just anyone through the door, it’s no longer exclusive. That’s what happens when your standards are too low—you settle, you compromise, and before you know it, you’re stuck in situations that don’t serve you.

So let’s just stop pretending that lowering your standards is humble or selfless. It’s not. It’s self-sabotage. Period.

Part 2: Why High Standards Are Empowering

Now, let’s get into why high standards are a glow-up move.

High Standards Filter Out the Noise
When you have high standards, you stop wasting time and energy on things that don’t align with your goals or values. That random guy who only texts you at 11 p.m.? Blocked. That “friend” who only calls when she needs something? Ghosted. Setting boundaries and raising your standards is like Marie Kondo-ing your life—only what sparks joy stays.

And you know what happens when you filter out the nonsense? You make space for the right people and opportunities to come through. It’s like clearing your inbox—no more spam, just the important stuff.

High Standards Attract Quality
Here’s a universal truth: You attract what you are. If you carry yourself with confidence and set high expectations, people notice. You automatically level up your circle, your opportunities, and even your lifestyle.

Think about it: Why do luxury brands never go on clearance? Because they know their value. They’d rather have a few loyal customers than be discounted for everyone. That’s the same energy you need. When you know your worth, you’re not afraid to say, “This isn’t good enough for me,” and that’s magnetic.

High Standards Build Self-Respect
Here’s where it gets personal. High standards are really about self-respect. It’s about knowing you deserve the best, whether that’s in love, work, or even how you talk to yourself. When you consistently hold yourself to a higher level, it changes the way you see yourself—and that’s powerful.

Remember: Every time you accept less than what you deserve, you’re sending a message to yourself that you’re not worth it. And honey, you are worth it.

Part 3: The Fear of High Standards

Okay, let’s address the elephant in the room. Why are people so triggered by high standards?

People Will Call You “Too Much”
Oh, you’ve heard it before: “You’re too picky.” “You’re too demanding.” Blah, blah, blah. Translation? “Your high standards make me uncomfortable because they force me to level up—or leave.”

Guess what? That’s their problem, not yours. Having high standards is never about being difficult; it’s about being clear. Clarity is intimidating to people who benefit from your confusion or lack of boundaries.

High Standards Require Effort
Let’s be real—having high standards isn’t the easy way out. It means holding yourself accountable, saying no to things that don’t serve you, and staying disciplined. But that’s also why it works.

It’s like fitness. You don’t get results by skipping workouts or eating junk food every day. You have to be consistent and intentional. The same goes for high standards—they require work, but the payoff is worth it.

Fear of Being Alone
Here’s a big one: A lot of women keep their standards low because they’re scared of being alone. They’d rather have a mediocre relationship or half-hearted friendships than face the fear of solitude.

But here’s the truth: Being alone is not the enemy. Being stuck in situations that drain you is. High standards might mean fewer people in your life, but the ones who stick around? They’ll be the real deal. Quality over quantity, always.

Part 4: How to Raise Your Standards

Alright, now that you’re convinced high standards are the move, let’s talk about how to do it.

Get Clear on What You Want
You can’t raise your standards if you don’t know what they are. Take some time to reflect. What does your dream life look like? What kind of people do you want around you? What behaviors will you no longer tolerate? Write it all down and get specific.

Level Up Your Habits
High standards aren’t just about what you demand from others—they’re about what you demand from yourself. Are you showing up for yourself? Are you consistent with your goals? If you want people to respect your time, do you respect your own?

Pro tip: Start with small habits. Make your bed every morning. Plan your day the night before. Stick to a skincare routine. The way you do the little things sets the tone for how you do the big things.

Enforce Boundaries
Let me be clear: High standards mean nothing if you don’t enforce them. It’s not just about saying, “I deserve better”—it’s about walking away when “better” doesn’t show up.

And yes, this can be uncomfortable. You might lose people or miss out on opportunities, but trust me, you’re dodging bullets.

Surround Yourself with Like-Minded People
Your vibe attracts your tribe. If you’re trying to maintain high standards while hanging around people who settle for less, you’re setting yourself up for failure. Find people who inspire you, challenge you, and hold themselves to the same high expectations.

Remember: Iron sharpens iron.

Be Patient
Raising your standards doesn’t yield instant results. It’s a process, and it requires patience. But the good news? Every small step you take compounds into something bigger.

Part 5: The Glow-Up Is Real

Here’s the best part about high standards: Once you embrace them, everything in your life starts to upgrade. You’re no longer running on autopilot or settling for whatever comes your way. You’re intentional, confident, and in control.

Your relationships? More fulfilling because they’re built on mutual respect.
Your career? Thriving because you’re not afraid to demand what you’re worth.
Your mindset? Stronger because you’re living proof of what’s possible when you choose yourself.
And let’s not forget—you become an example for other women, too. When you carry yourself with high standards, you’re basically giving everyone else permission to do the same.

So, here’s the takeaway: High standards aren’t just about being “extra” or “picky.” They’re about choosing a life that aligns with your worth. And the truth is, the only people who’ll be mad about your high standards are the ones who can’t meet them.

So, stay unapologetic and remember: You’re the main character, and the main character never settles.

Until next time.

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